The Happiness High

There are many days when I feel very very lucky. I feel lucky everyday with what I have, but there are some days when I feel really lucky. I just can't help but dwell on how extremely lucky I am, when I know that a million things could have gone wrong, and I would not be where I am today.

I was having one of these moments last night. Last night, I found out that I was going to a Collegeboard Conference to talk about my immigrant experience. The audience were mainly counselors, educators, and teachers from the western region of the U.S. Though I have talked about my immigrant experience before, I was suddenly feeling really lucky last night. I think about all the people who have gotten me to where I am today, and how if it weren't for them, I probably would not had the chance to speak at this Collegeboard Conference earlier today. Would I have been strong enough to be able to do this if it weren't for the tremendous support I receive? Would I be in school right now, if I did not know of the resources AB 540 students can use? I feel so empowered that I am able to do this, to expose myself for the betterment of the movement and help us all. Looking back to where I was just even a year ago, I never thought I would be able to share my story. I never thought I would risk sharing my status with anyone. I felt lucky today that I was contributing to the movement, that I was about to tell our stories and struggles to these people who can help us, and will make a difference for us and future undocumented students. I think about how our voice saves the lives of younglings, and how we encourage each other to stay positive and pursue an education.

Everything I am doing today, I never thought I would be able to do it. Sharing my story can shake me up, and I often shake and tremble, because of the traumatic experiences I have had. But here is why I do it:

After the 2-hour workshop today, several educators came up to me and a fellow AB 540 student, and shook our hands. I cannot forget her words. There were about 25 educators in the room, and she walked to our table where we were sitting and told us: "I just wanted to personally thank and say to you, that even though there weren't too many people here today, I will make sure that many people will hear your voice. I will take this back to my campus, and will educate a room of 2,500 people. You guys empower and motivate me. Thank you for sharing. This workshop really helped a lot."

Others came up to us saying variations of that.

Whenever I do AB 540 workshops on weekends to high school students, parents, community members, it feels like I have won a million dollars when parents come up to our group and thank us for doing this and that it really helped them.

I am happy when I get random e-mails from people asking me if we are able to do a workshop for them. I also love meeting new people who are curious about my volunteer work.

I can't help but feel happy when a new person joins the movement and feels empowered with the work all of us undocumented students and allies have done.

When I attended a Student of Color Conference last year, we broke off into groups that we identified with. There was an AB 540 group, and Allies of AB 540 students group at the conference, and our rooms were right next to each other. I can't help but feel happy when there were only about 20 students in the AB 540 group, but the Allies group had probably about 60 peeople in there. I can't help but feel the change we are creating by educating our fellow friends, and how humbled I feel from our allies' support that we have built up.

I love going to community and AB 540 meetings and seeing how pumped up everyone is. The energy is so strong, it's contagious.

And this is why I get involved. I experience a feeling I call a "happiness high". It feels like I'm producing millions of endorphins that just make me so relaxed and content. Knowing the fact that I am making a difference is one of the greatest feeling I have ever experienced. Every incident like this reminds me that we are saving another AB 540 student, we are sharing our hope, our strength and our courage. We are uniting, erasing racism one bit at a time, reminding people of the importance of helping our communities and alleviating everyone's pain. This is why I am lucky, to have experienced this acute happiness, because of the people who gave me hope and courage to stand up. I feel honored to be able to pass this on to humanity.